Punter Yarns - One For the Good Guys

Our legendary Punter, let’s call him Wacko Jacko for privacy reasons, was at the Doomben races when he sidled up to a bookie for a speculative small each way bet.

I wasn’t confident so thought two bucks on the fifty to one pop would do and get a big day off to a flying start.

I gave the bagman a pineapple and he gave me back a tenner.

“Where’s me other thirty four bucks, you clown? I gave you a fifty so should get forty six dollars change”, I asked, or words to that affect.

“Eff off, you said twenty bucks each way” he responded, handing me my ticket.

Of course the nag didn’t run a drum and I’m out forty clams instead of four. So there was only one thing for it, strut up to the bar for a few amber ales, and started to dissect the form.

“That’ll do” I said, coming across a 7/2 chance certainty that was second up after a spell.

I went to the same bookie, to test his hearing, and this time only pulled a five buck note from my pocket so he couldn’t stooge me again. Anyway, the beautiful mare got up and I went back to collect my HUGE $17.50. (I was rebuilding my kitty).

To my surprise this rogue trader grabbed my ticket and pulled out 3 x pineapples, a twenty, and five dollar note. “This absolute joker is giving me one hundred and seventy five smackers” – thought. And sure enough, he paid me out $175. A good 157.50 more than he should’ve, and more than comfortably remunerated me for the time he shafted me, earlier.

“Thanks buddy” I said, not feeling one bit guilty. I might’ve told him had he not told me Eff Off the other time.

I hurried back to my mates and them all a sherbert on the bookie.

Cheers, Wacko Jacko, we don’t just want to hear big financial wins, we always like to hear about wins for the good guys.